This blog post should really be called: How to support your fiance who plays baseball and has been with six different teams since you’ve known him and is still chasing his dream but now with you and a dog in the picture.
So, this might be a bit of a niche post because im not really sure exactly how many people are in my position (I know im not the only one but its also pretty rare). To begin this post, I want to start out with Alec’s journey since him and I met with a little time line to make things easier.
February 2017 – Alec and I met while he was in Spring training with the Phillies
March 2017 – Alec gets traded to the Baltimore Orioles like, 3 days before spring training ends
March 2018 – Alec gets DFA’d (designated for assignment)
April 2018 – Alec gets picked up by the Dodgers and moves to OKC for AAA
10 days later – Alec was DFA’d
2 days later – Alec was picked up by the Milwaukee Brewers but sent to AAA so he moved to Colorado Springs
October 2019 – Alec became a free agent
January 2019 – Alec signed a minor league contract with the Rockies
March 2019 – Alec was released
April 2019 – Alec Signed with the Sugar Land Skeeters which did not workout so he decided to come home.
Beginning of May 2019 – Alec decided to take this season off and train for next. He bought us a puppy on the way home fro Texas.
One week later – He get an offer from the long Island ducks and left.
Currently – Alec is now playing Independent ball with the Long Island Ducks just trying to keep his arm in shape and will hopefully be picked up soon.
Reminder: If this does not sounds like enough going on, this whole time Alec was in between AAA and the bigs which means a lot of last minute moves and uncertainty.
As you could now imagine, Alec’s job is way more difficult and mentally consuming than most people would think. Yes, it is difficult for me too, but he is the one first-hand going through all of it, so as I mentioned in my last post, I need to be there for him and support him as much as I can because ultimately I want him to be happy and successful in whatever he does.
So here I am, working full time, going to school full time, planning a wedding, with a 13 week old puppy (she’s my world now), while still maintaining all of my relationships and planning trips (I have to drive now) so Alec can see the puppy.
Yes, I am exhausted, like all of the time. But watching Alec play baseball and knowing what he has gone through to accomplish everything he has is so rewarding. I have been with Alec through all of his DFA’s which is always scary and nerve-wracking, trades, and ups-and downs. I have been with him after he’s thrown horrible games and wants to quit, but also through standing ovations in major league baseball fields.
I have learned that a grown man does not just want you to tell them “every thing will be okay” and hold their hand. They need a certain type of support, sometimes they just need silence and a big beer to feel okay. It is my job as his future wife to know what he needs in those moments and he does the same for me.
There’s also the social media factor. Alec tries to stay off of it because of how it makes him feel but its rough. We know players that have had bad games and gotten death threats, people have told Alec on Instagram that they hope he breaks him arm.. not cool guys. Not cool. People think the athletes do not see these comments or run their own accounts but they do, and they see everything, and it effects them. When he has a bad game or something, I try to keep him off of the internet but it is also important for them to get constructive criticism also. That is what the coach is for though, not social media trolls.
While being the sweet loving fiancé is so important, these guys also need someone who will tell them how it is. “Be better”, “you know what you did wrong and you have to fix it”… Weather it is for baseball or life in general, I have a lot of these quotes that I have to pull out sometimes and he knows when I say these things, it’s serious and he’s got to pull it together.
Alec trusts me and knows I will support his dreams no matter what, while still keeping him on track for success and happiness. We make a pretty great team but you know what they say, “behind every song man is a stronger woman” 😉
Getting Married to the Game 